bad choice to open that email now

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I don’t know when I’ve become so caught up in grades and awards. Maybe it’s coz since Secondary school, I’ve never been the one who got the good grades or any award.  Yea, I know I can only blame myself then for not putting in more effort. Now that I’m in college, I’m putting in all this effort, but I’m not getting anything at all.

The worst part is someone whom I feel is undeserving is getting it instead. Where have I gone wrong? What have I done wrong? 我真的不懂我为了什么在加油。为了什么在拼命的好好读书。At the end of the day, I’m still stuck at the starting point. 真的好累。我真的好累。

Argh. Wrong time to open the email. Why did I have to look at the list of awardees when I have to write an 8 page essay? Now my mood is like shit. Trying to listen to music to calm myself and complaining to a good friend who is trying her best to cheer me up.

I have 2 choices: 1) motivate myself to do even better 2) give up. As much as I hate it, I know which I’ll choose in the end.

surveying people is hard work

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I like doing surveys. And since last semester, I’ve become the one creating the survey and going out to ask people to fill it in. It is a tough job, but it’s ok…I don’t hate it.

Getting people to do surveys is hard work:

  • You need to be thick-skinned.
  • You need to be able to handle rejection and not let it bother you.
  • You need to be smart so as to minimize rejection.
  • You need perseverance. Collecting data IS long and hard.
  • You need to try every single resource you have. That does not mean you do things blindly.
  • You need to be able to resist temptation. How you achieve this will determine whether your work is biased or not.

survey for advertising class

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My group mates and I desperately need help. This is a survey for project for an Advertising class. The target market is Hispanics/Latinos/Latinas. So far, there have not been that many responses that are within the target market. If you know someone who’s within that target market, please ask them to fill in this survey. If you are within that target market, please help fill in. Thanks!

The survey URL:
https://spreadsheets.google.com/viewform?formkey=dDF5SXZzdWVMRjBTeExUNkZqUlQtcHc6MA

i will prepare for class x100

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If there was any day I had to be more ashamed of myself than ever, today would be the day. I spent the whole weekend preparing cover letters and my resume that I didn’t prepare for Japanese class. No doubt I studied a bit for the kanji quiz, but I totally didn’t do the stuff in the workbook. Not like it mattered really since we don’t get points anymore for homework, but it mattered coz I was unable to answer questions.

I was praying hard that sensei wouldn’t call me, but the class is too small to even miss me. They weren’t exactly difficult questions that I had to answer, but suddenly calling on me like that and me being unprepared and panicky…my mind went blank. Yes, I was frantically searching my mind for the Japanese word for “exercise.” Not that I didn’t know it, but like I said, my mind went blank. And so, I could not answer even the simplest of questions.

It’s funny coz it made me think back of the time when I was in Primary 4. I had one hell of a mean Chinese teacher. You wouldn’t want to not do your homework or forget to bring something. She would just give the shelling of your life that would make you cringe in a corner. Not to mention her making you tell your parents to write what she called a “guarantee letter.” A letter that just meant that your parents have acknowledged your misbehavior and would make sure that this would never happen again. Of course, this also meant that you would get scolded and possibly whacked by your parents too. Ok, she isn’t that mean. She is just one very fierce teacher. On normal occasions, she is nice and concerned.

So, for today’s misbehavior…

Continue reading →

the death of magazines?

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We discussed in ADV483 about the death of print, tv, and radio. With the internet sticking around, these media are suffering. Anyway, someone in my class said that if anything at all, he thinks magazines would be the first to go. Prof. Clifton just laughed coz she said immediately after he said that, a few hands shot up in the air – all female. Apparently men around the early 20’s are a hard target market for magazines which is why men would argue against magazines while women would be like “uh uh, you ain’t taking away my magazines.”

Sure, I’m one of those female tech nerds. I cannot live without the internet. My dad says my eyes are turning square like the computer monitor coz I spend too much time on the computer. My sis used to say I would never get a boyfriend coz I keep sticking to the computer and don’t meet people (GUYS in particular) outside. Proved her wrong anyway since I’m now with a wonderful guy for two years already. That’s all beside the point. The point is I spend hours on the computer, yet there are moments when I feel I need to read a magazine. Even if I know the magazines might pile up coz I might not have time to read them, I damn well need a magazine to flip through.

I like magazines coz they are easy reading material. I like certain magazines just coz I like the layout. Incidentally, even when I entered college, I was still reading CosmoGirl. The magazine was targeted at high school kids, but I simply loved the layout so much. Not to mention that I’ve been reading this magazine since its first issue.

My best argument why magazines are here to stay: You can bring your laptop into the loo when you’re doing the big one, but it isn’t comfortable. Reading magazines is a much better choice of activity while in the loo.

miss antsy pantsy

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Today, Elisia is Miss antsy-in-my-pantsy.

Never felt so nervous, yet have that “I’m so raring to go” feeling in a long time. All because we changed textbooks for JAPN204. We started using the 中級日本語 textbook today and with that, we needed to memorize about 8 short lines of conversation text to do role play in class. I hate presentations so I was all ready to be the first to go. Get it over and done with. Then we had to hold a conversation with the person next to us based on a chosen subject/question. I managed to get my idea across pretty decently…ok, with one or two broken sentences. But, I was definitely feeling more confident in speaking.

I think we’ve pretty much reached the stage where it’s no longer intensive/extensive learning of vocabulary and grammar, but more into actually using what we’ve learnt to hold conversations. Something which I need to practise and do more. I also realised that it is ok to use simple sentence structures to say what I want to say as long as the other person can get a general idea. It’s better than wanting to jump into using complex sentences, not knowing how to, then getting all frustrated, and finally giving up and speaking in English instead. And of course, I need to feel more confident and less afraid of making mistakes.

Anyway, directly after JAPN204, I had ADV483. There was a quiz today so I had to rush off quickly. (The buildings for both classes are a distance apart.) All that rushing made me feel all the more jumpy, plus the fact that I wasn’t too sure I had prepared well for the quiz.

Alright, that’s about all I’m going to say for today. Need to get some sleep especially since I think I’m about to fall sick. My nose was all blocked and drippy last night. However, before I go, here’s an interesting picture. This is what I call a “minefield.” That’s ice and not snow by the way. The unsuspecting person who walks over it will find it is VERY slippery and you’ll be lucky if you don’t find yourself on your butt. There are lots of these “minefields” all around since the last few days have been pretty cold. It snows, then melts a little, and the water freezes again as the temperature drops.

It’s supposed to snow tonight and tomorrow…

the bad and the not so bad

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Stupid 拾って。You are the cause of my losing one mark for nothing. Of all things you had to be ひろって。Now, you are the cause of my misery. I want to bite and throw a hissy fit…because it’s my first JAPN204 exam and if it doesn’t go well in the beginning, it can only get worse. We are going to use the 中級日本語 textbook on Monday. We will have to memorize and act out short passages. There will be a shitload of kanji to remember. I don’t have good memory. Argh.

On a lighter note, Christina gave me one of those My Beauty Diary masks yesterday. 谢谢你! 我爱死你了! :woot: It was quite funny. I was going to ask her if she could help me buy some of those masks when she went back to Taiwan during summer. Turns out, she uses them. She had a few left and decided to give one to me. :heart: Will get her to buy more when she goes back to Taiwan. Yay yay yay~~~

It’s too expensive for me to join those Singapore sprees and have them send it to me in USA. And anyway, I wouldn’t be going home this summer so joining the spree would not be an option. Then I had the brilliant idea of asking one of my Taiwanese friends here.

watashi wa xx-san ni ijimeraremashita

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We read a passage in Japanese class about bullying incidents in school. I came up with scenarios/reasons for bullying – mostly in the perspective of a girl.

Elementary school: Bullying cases would probably be the I beat, pinch, pull your hair kinda nonsense. Usually kids go crying to the teacher saying so-and-so bullied me. Milder cases would probably just end with a “I tell my mummy you bully me” or “I don’t friend you.”

Middle school (probably around upper primary/lower secondary): Girls would probably bully other girls out of jealousy? The I-just-can’t-stand-her-face issue.

High school: Girls bully other girls probably because that bitch stole my boyfriend.

College: Sensei said that bullying cases are rare since college students are considered adults and know better. Oh no, I think at this stage girls bully other girls because that slut slept with my boyfriend.

Anyway, since we were on the topic on bullying, Jayce told me that his EALC250 Professor told the class about a case where a 7-8 year old Japanese kid beheaded another kid and hung the head on the school gate. Okaaaayyy…that kid’s psycho. もっと怖い~~~

pick a number from 1 to 9

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We failed miserably. Everyone from the Spring 2010 ADV450 creative class. Our first little test of whether those creative juices flowed within us.

The test was simple. We were told to pick a number from 1 to 9. Our lecturer then had us all put our hands up. Every time he called out a number and it corresponded to the one we had in mind, we put down our hand. It only took him 9 tries to get everyone’s hand down. But of course, there can only be 9 numbers from 1 to 9 right? WRONG. What happened to 3.5 or 2.3333333 or one and a quarter? Aren’t those numbers too? He didn’t say to pick a WHOLE number from 1 to 9. We just assumed it.

The lesson was to not let our assumptions limit us, our creativity.

That I will have to argue. I told Jayce about that little interesting test. Even he said that only a creative class would allow for such answers. Any other class would just have you labeled as the class joker and smart aleck.

Because this is how the world functions. How society has shaped the majority of us to be. You would need some guts to go against it, to allow yourself to be that class joker or smart aleck kid and not be bothered by how other people think of you.

That’s exactly how Singapore functions. We mug and mug to become the elite. We mug and mug to give the correct answers in class. Creativity? Sure, they talked about thinking out of the box and all, but how come I still cringe when the teacher calls on me? How come I’m so afraid of making mistakes? How come I’m still afraid that my classmates will think I’m stupid.

I’m afraid I can’t teach you anything just because I studied overseas and you probably think I can bring fresh ideas to the table. No. I do not have the magic or capability to change how things have been done in a certain way for X number of years. Each of you have it in yourselves. You can either do it the same way you’ve been doing for X number of years or you can prepare yourself and allow the change to be made.

I’m sorry, the last paragraph is kind of a rant over a job/work.

the marketing course was a joke

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I will try to blog more often, but for now, here are last semester’s grades.

ADV481 – A+H
BADM320 – B-
JAPN203 – A
MS326 – A

Total GPA = 3.71
Cumulative GPA = 3.72

The marketing course was a joke. It is the only reason that my GPA has gone down. Both semester and cumulative GPA. If anyone is thinking of taking it, don’t.

On a happier note, I did surprisingly well for advertising research. The “H” indicates that I took it for James Scholar credit. Yupz, I enrolled in the James Scholar Honors program. I can hear someone going “finally~~~” It was also the cause of my worries (the James Scholar program, not ADV481).  I was so worried that I’ll be dropped from the program since I knew I was going to get a B for BADM320 and I had not been doing too well on the ADV481 exams.

It was a tough time for ADV481 since I was doing a group project all by myself for the James Scholar credit. Yes, I surveyed more than 80 people myself. I figured out the data myself (ok, with the help of the professor). In short, what could have been 4-5 brains on one project, I only had one brain – my brain – to work on it. Of course the good part about it was that I didn’t need to deal with crappy group mates and I could structure everything the way I wanted it to be.

Now, I worry for JAPN204. Things are getting harder and I found myself having trouble making sentences for 2 new Japanese terms today. There is more weightage on daily participation now since homework is not graded and does not contribute to the total percentage. Which simply means less easy stuff to make up my final grade. To an extent, this is good coz it forces us to actually understand and use the language. It’s like taking off the trainer wheels on your bicycle so that you don’t rely on them too much and actually learn how to cycle. The bad side to it is…I can’t guarantee that I can keep getting an A. Which is a worrying thing coz I need to keep my semester GPA at 3.5 and above to remain in the James Scholar program.

I checked out with the College of Media office, I’ll get my cord no matter whether I was enrolled in the James Scholar program from freshman year or whichever year. I really want that cord. To other people it may be nothing, but to me it means everything. I have never been the smartest kid with the ton of awards. This cord will represent some sort of academic achievement and recognition, something which I never really had.