for so long…so long

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I’m not sure if I should go on a hiatus. I don’t get much computer time anymore. When I get to use the computer, I’ve got other things to do…blogging becomes last priority and I never get to it in the end. When I want to blog, I don’t have access to my computer.

I’m still trying to figure out my own emotions. It was a momentary release when my grandparents went back to Malaysia for 6 days or so. No, it was a momentary release for 3 of us (Mum, Sis and I). I felt I could breathe again. I didn’t have to feel guilty for once and I could go around the house doing the things I wanted to. I didn’t have to feel like I was keeping my temper in check all the time. Although I hate that I have to be like that, I can’t help it. All the disappointment just sums up. I don’t feel like talking to my own grandparents. How fuckin’ sad is that?

At work, I just go about doing my work and stop thinking about my own emotions. I guess it’s to numb out what I feel. Anyway, at work there’s always other things to worry about. Like whether I’m doing things right and that I should keep mistakes at a minimum.

Oh by the way, I’m still in NTUC Income. I was going to quit but they offered an admin position. So I’m in the Motor Processing team now. Basically, I just key in data for Motor insurance proposals and issue Motor insurance policies. Of course, data entry is always a boring job coz it’s routine but I think I much prefer that to being a call agent. At least I don’t feel like murdering anyone anymore.

I’m on an AAA high again. I just asked Ling to help me get their 2nd and 3rd concert dvds at Narita airport if she manages to find them. Thank God she’s only transiting or else I would have asked her to get me a lot more stuff and she’ll hate me for that. Heehee~~~ I got their 2nd album with dvd from Mariyanto’s friend. Happy~~~

I’ll be broke this month. I spent $200+ on NewS. So happy that they are back. I still remember listening to “Dreams” and getting a little emotional. Ordered stuff from this year’s spring con (I won’t get to go anyway…) + their new single (both normal and limited editions) + 2007 calendar. Kinda pissed off that I ordered Jrs calendar coz I thought NewS wasn’t going to have their own calendar. Guess I’ll sell it off later if I don’t want it. I kinda have this small nagging feeling that Kusano and Uchi are not coming back and that NewS will remain as a 6-man group. Hope I’m wrong… Anyway, thanks to Celestine for helping me get Massu’s uchiwa from Countdown concert. 🙂

Magazines will be coming in this Friday. Mise was closed yesterday…so no Miso Soup till next weekend. So much for getting high in HMV when I saw Miso Soup on the shelf. 

NewS released a new pv for サヤエンドウ! Ain’t that great though coz it’s mostly scenes from last year’s spring con. And sorry Massu, Shige looked the most handsome in spring con while singing サヤエンドウ. But Massu as usual, you made me laugh.

I finished watching “궁“. *victory sign* Very enjoyable korean drama. *dreamy look* Conquering “タイヨのうた” next. 沢尻 エリカ looks very different in タイヨのうた. Way more grown up than in １リットルの涙.

Was kinda happy when I saw NANA anime episodes uploaded in clubbox. But alas, my happiness was shortlived. It refused to download. Damn. Cathay should really bring in the NANA movie. What are you guys waiting for? It was already featured in the Singapore news. BRING IT IN!!! Sidenote, Ling also thinks that 市川由衣 doesn’t suit the role of 小松奈々 in NANA2.

Lastly, merry christmas, happy birthday, happy new year, happy whatever…all the occasions I missed wishing here. I missed blogging about Wawa’s, Chloe’s, Yui’s, PK’s, CJ’s, Sis’s birthdays. I missed blogging on XW and Paul’s wedding. Congratulations to both of you. I missed blogging on 7ners gathering at Albert Court Hotel. Things which I don’t feel like blogging anymore. No reason why. Once the feeling is gone, it’s gone.

work, school, my life

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Few things to address…

Home
realistic-soul.net is 2! I don’t remember the exact date I bought this domain but since my site went down for awhile coz it was time to pay up then I knew. I downgraded my webspace plan. Over-ambitious me bought quite a huge amount of webspace only to let it go to waste for over one year. I don’t think I’ll ever get round to fixing all my photos for uploading so yea, the space will only be used for my blog, tcg post and fanlisting site. Not forgetting my 2 hostees. 🙂

School
I’m praying hard that I’ll get a better score for SAT. It went ok. Maybe coz I’ve experienced it before, this time round I was more concious of the time constraint. I managed to finish each section on time. Didn’t stumble over any Math question which is like a miracle.

I wouldn’t say I was totally serious about studying, laziness still got the better of me. My preparation was just all the exercises in the super thick preparation book and 3 full papers. Anyone could say that that wasn’t enough studying.

Kinda did the whole comparison thing when I found out that Shaz and my cousin would be taking it at the same time. I started to feel that I couldn’t match up to others. That I would be the lousiest in terms of grades. I know I shouldn’t be doing this but I can’t help it. 😥

Other than the SAT, I need to pick up my referral letter from Mr D and to actually get cracking on those essays. Kinda rush I know but if I don’t start, I never will.

Work
Although I don’t really like what I’m doing now, it’s not like I hate it to the point I’m going to breakdown any moment. For the sake of the pay, which is quite good for a temporary job, I wanted to stick it out for the 6 months. Quitting now would mean that I’ll have to go through the hassle of looking for a job and in that time, I would have lost some income. Besides, this job is at prime location, within walking distance from home. I can wake up at 7am and still not be late.

Alas, it’s not to be. I just went through appraisal. Firstly, they think I’m doing fine. Phew! Then, they dropped the bomb. There are too many inbound call agents. After the peak period, each team would be rotated to do outbound calls aka telemarketing. Frankly speaking, telemarketing is not my cup of tea. Not that I’m writing off the job without even trying but I know that it’s just not the job for me. Even as an inbound call agent, there are times where I struggle to be firm when it comes to requests by customers. I can empathise with some of them and want to accede to their requests but I know I can’t coz I’m not in that position to do so.

I refer to the comment that Pwen made a few entries ago on how to be firm yet able to empathise. She said I could try repeating the fact that it’s the company policy. But if you were to put yourself in the customer’s shoes, there are times where this simply wouldn’t work. I end up trying to put myself in both positions – as the call agent and as the customer and end up feeling more miserable than ever. I don’t think I can block out these thoughts and just be thick-skinned and more persuasive, something which telemarketeers should be.

The only other way would be to request for a change in job within the company. A change to something more of data entry/admin nature. But DUH…we all know that data entry is like a no-brainer job for me. No challenge at all since I know I can handle it. The last time I worked in a data entry job, everyday was just keying in data into those same fields that I practically became a robot. I could type at super speed without even reading those fields coz I could remember the order. There was even once or twice that I fell asleep at the keyboard and if not for the loud beep from the computer that I’m holding on to a key for too long, I would have just slept on.

Anyway, there are very few data entry positions in this branch. Even as we speak, there’s an application waiting for a data entry/admin opening that has been there for some time already. Might have a higher chance in HQ but that would mean I’ll have to spend on transport and wake up much earlier. No more free ride to work since Mum has retired from her job.

No hard feelings if I want to quit though. Although it is said that it is a 6 month contract, there are no conditions that bind me to the company. We can still part amicably even before the term is up. But…but…but…I NEED THE MONEY!!! I’m putting aside $300 each month I get my pay for my Japan trip next year. If I give up the job, there’s no guarantee I’ll get another job of equal pay or higher than that of now. Worse, what if there’s nothing available for some time.

Entertainment
Went to the concert sponsored by ABC Stout yesterday. A concert with Chen Sheng, Pin Guan and Mayday. Went with Sis, Jiemin and Angeline. Enjoyed myself though the concert ended quite late thus I had to take urgent leave today.

I wanted to post this earlier but didn’t have the time to and my site was down for a day or so. Per gave me the link for DBSK’s clips on Youtube. Xiah is just too cute! :rofl:

in those lonely minutes

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Since yesterday, my neighbour at work, Roseleen, decided to break the silence in the morning by listening to music. Her neighbour is still updating her blog and reading blogs to entertain herself in those lonely minutes where MSN is not available.

It’s not like MSN is not available. As I type, the Windows Messenger icon is staring back at me. Now, it only takes some guts to click on that but I wouldn’t want the IT assistant and superiors breathing down my neck in any case. So there.

Heh. I wonder how I managed to describe anytime during work as lonely. Anyone would know that a call centre is lively and you can never stop talking. Haha.

going high-tech

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It came as a laugh for me. Never imagined NTUC Income to get all high-tech. Oh well, they have caught on on the youtube craze. You can almost find anything and everything on youtube these days. Wonder whose brilliant idea was it.

CEO’s interview on how to maximise investment returns for your CPF savings.
*It looks kinda ermz…unnatural…so scripted. Like I can be soooo darn convincing you know.*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3-XN58XsGk

Corporate commercial. NTUC Income Insurance Cooperative…Your Partner for a Better Life
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7iYhGIXv1g

Hahaha…oopz. =X

cars and the insurance

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Any Singaporean who doesn’t drive would also know that owning a car in Singapore is a killer. Most would say it’s the COE that’s the killer. I would say it’s the whole package.

Ever since I started dealing with motor insurance, I must say I’ve learnt quite a bit. I’m even itching to churn out a quotation for myself with the scenarios of me owning a car or scooter now.

Firstly, the law requires every driver to have at least third party motor insurance. And DUH, you have to pay road tax as well. The premium for the insurance is based on both the driver and the car. A young driver (of 21 years) and with little driving experience. Let’s not be too ambitious, say this young person drives a normal saloon car. The premium would be around $1000+ already. If this young person decides to drive a high performance car…woohoo…lagi best.

$1000 every year for at least 3 years. I don’t think I want to spend that kind of money on a car. Cars are afterall a luxury. Convenient but I don’t think it’s a total necessity in such a small country.

Now, we talk about how one should go about buying the insurance. Usually, dads wouldn’t want to put their children as named drivers so they can escape the high premiums. That’s like the stupidest (is there such a word?) move. If your son is now 21 years old and has less than 2 years of driving experience and he manages to get your car all banged up in an accident, there’s going to be an excess of $2000+. $500 more to get your son to be a named driver or bear the $2000+ excess when he gets into an accident?

NTUC Income offers 2 plans for Comprehensive cover. The one with the lower premium has an excess of $500. The one with the slightly higher premium has a waiver of the excess and a courtesy car benefit. Putting the issue of the courtesy car aside. Paying about $200 more for the waiver of the excess or bearing the full $500 excess? I think if you’re the kind who hasn’t got lady luck on your side or isn’t too confident a driver yet should go for the one with the higher premium.

I almost had one closing for motor insurance today. Unfortunately this wife of the policy holder does not know her husband’s credit card number. With that, I broke the chain of good luck I had for the past 4 days. 6 closings in 4 days…and a long list of logins and logouts. There’s the pros and cons to everything. I may have had the luck of 6 closings when another newbie has none to his name, but my call volume has dropped tremendously. Due to the many times of logging-out to finish up the paperwork, my average call volume of 50+ calls has dropped to 40+. And my table is awfully messy with papers. I’m annoyed at my disorganised self. :glare:

management lessons

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Today’s a bad day. 🙁

I had to handle 2 problematic calls which of course, I pick the calls, MY ass is on the line. To kena twice in a day makes me feel like I’m going to be suay for 3 years.

I cannot understand why people refuse to accept the alternative and want to persist in forcing you into a corner. Just as you want me to understand your position, please try to understand mine. I am not in the position where I can make decisions and promise you anything. We try to give you the best we can offer at the moment while we rectify the problem but that does not mean the change can be made instantaneously. I don’t have magic. I can’t just wave a wand now and make everything ok. So stop trying to make me feel damn small. Stop thinking you can insult my intelligence just coz I can’t argue back. Bottomline: don’t think that just coz you’re the customer, you’re ALWAYS right. It’s not true ok.

The first call made me so frustrated and pissed off that I just wrote “FUCK” on my rough paper. I was even ready to break my pencil in two. Anyway, I wrote some angry words next to her name on my call log sheet. She’s condemned by me. :angry: :angry: :angry:

I need some management lessons. Tell me how to be empathise and yet stay firm. I realise when I empathise with the customer, they somehow get bolder and continue on and on. Oh well, in other words, they finally succeed in making me feel small and I end up having to escalate the call to my team leader. It’s so frustrating. The normal me would have just argued back and even put down the phone if I feel like it. But here, I have to (pretend) to be patient and understanding when I’m bursting inside to tell the person on the line to just fuck off.

moving along fine

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I think I’m coming along fine. I just completed a week of my no-life shift. Each team is taking turns to work late each week from now till Dec.

Next week I’ll be going for motor insurance training. Good luck to me. Moving forward from the comfort of working on the easiest type of insurance – travel insurance.

Quite interesting. I get to learn/experience some very interesting things. Like yesterday, I got a call from a lady saying that Finnair cabin crew are on strike, she has to cancel her trip and wants to know whether she can claim for the her prepaid hotel expenses.

Our department also got warned of a very interesting lady. I tell you, this woman is DA BEST. She has always been getting extra 5% discount from her agent. So she expects the whole department to know about it. Best part, she will call up to TEST people. And she will scold you if you don’t know about it. Poor Elly got scolded by her. This is being totally unreasonable. How can the whole department know? There will always be new staff coming in, can’t expect them to know everything right? WTF. So suay to kena scolded by this kinda people. Imagine being suay for 3 years for NOTHING lahz. :angry: :angry: :angry:

Pffffft.

Happy Deepavali to all my indian friends.

And Happy 21st birthday to 7ners’ dear Pwen. We miss you.

the irony at work

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Almost 2 weeks in the new job. Seriously speaking, I wasn’t too sure of it when I started out. I hadn’t expected to be working in a call centre. When I was told I would be answering calls, I didn’t expect like 24/7. I tried very hard to convince myself to not give up. The words of the lady at the career centre in UIUC imprinted in my mind. “If you haven’t tried (a job), how can you say you don’t like it?” Thus, I promised to give myself one month.

By the second day of answering calls, I was really toying with the idea of giving up. I talked to Mum. She told me I could quit if I want to. That maybe this isn’t the job cut out for me. But she warned me to think whether I was using this as an excuse or I truly felt that way. I weighed my options and decided to stick it out coz that meant I would have some sort of income. Besides, Mum said that if Sis and I wanted to go to Japan next year, we’ll have to pay for our own trip expenses. *sigh*

Inwardly, I told myself I could do it. That I always managed to survive everything I got thrown into. I may not emerge tops but at least I will learn to float. True enough, I’m starting to feel a little more confident. Thank goodness for my nice colleagues. I think they really put up with my many calls to clarify certain things, however small the doubt is.

I’ve met with some pretty nice customers. One very nice Mrs Tan said she’ll ask her agent to buy me a drink and that I was very patient. I thought she was the one being very patient with me. I had to call her back twice coz I wasn’t too sure of the terms and conditions. I’ve had another customer say “God bless you”. God bless you too. 🙂

I’ve had not so nice customers too. Like today. Some insurance agents are pretty obnoxious. They think just coz they are in more or less the same line as us, that they know most of the rules, then they are higher up. They are so impatient. One called in to activate a policy for his client. It is by standard procedures that we have to confirm the policy holder’s address and phone numbers. Common sense. Wrong address = don’t receive policy. Simple logic right? While I was repeating the address, the agent kept cutting me off with his impatient “ya…ya…YA”. Think you are so damn smart right? Wait till the address is wrong and your client doesn’t receive the policy. What are you going to do then? Call back to scold us right?

Then came the next agent. Called in to check on 2 of his clients’ policies. One was fine. The other was supposed to have been amended with one more insured. Checked the notes history to see if someone had already alerted the officer-in-charge. Sure, there was one but strange thing was that it was marked inactive but the changes have not been reflected. I told the agent that and wanted to offer to check it out. That was when he insisted (rudely) that he wanted the policy to be cancelled. That he would create another policy with all the correct details. I got so confused, I didn’t even take down his number.

Was getting alarmed. Cancelling a policy would mean that the customer would not get a full refund. There would be a $15 cancellation fee. I didn’t take down the agent’s number so I couldn’t call him back. Decided to call the policy holder instead. She picked up the phone on my second call but before I could explain everything, she cut me off saying she was in a meeting. So, we’re back to square one and I was running out of time. Had to get to the agent before he created a new policy.

Getting my mind to do things step by step, I called one of my colleagues to help me with the note. Why it was marked inactive by the officer but the changes have not been made. She explained that they need time to get to that. I told her of what happened and she helped me get the agent’s number via the directory. Every agent has a rep code so we can use that to find out their contact details.

I called the guy, explaining that I already checked out the problem and that time was needed to see the changes being reflected. So no worries coz the officer did see the note and will make the changes. He insisted he wanted it to be cancelled. I told him that he couldn’t do that coz there would be a $15 charge. The guy decided to get all rude on me. Said that I was wasting his time and why couldn’t I just cancel the policy like he said. That we have an online application form to make things faster for us right? I didn’t dare promise him anything more coz I wouldn’t want to be held responsible if I promised the wrong things so I offered to let him talk to my (higher up) colleague so she could explain things to him.

Anyway, the minute I put down the phone, I muttered “fuckin’ asshole” under my breath. That asshole managed to spoil my day. I was like ready to scold every vulgarity under the sun. Shamala’s right. There will always be one customer to spoil your day. I HATE UNREASONABLE PEOPLE LIKE HIM! :angry: :angry: :angry: To appease my anger and frustration at not being able to scold out loud, I decided to draw an angry face beside his name on the call log sheet. Yes, he’s condemned by me now.

It’s quite ironic that we have to talk to people so sweetly though we really want to reach over and stab them. Just one call to make you so angry and the next call comes in and you have to pretend like nothing’s wrong. “Good morning/afternoon. NTUC Income. This is Elisia speaking. How may I assist you?”

jobless

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Bad news. My supposed supervisor was supposed to hand in the request for temporary staff to the director’s office. He didn’t know so anyway, he finally did. And bad news. The director did not approve, saying that their department has enough temporary staff and coz of the budget, no more new temporary staff at the moment. Which means, I can’t work in my mum’s office. Which also means, I’m jobless now.

Way to go manz. So now I have to get another job. I’m going to leave going back to Mos last coz the pay is very little.

Good news. I just recorded my voice message greeting. So now if I miss the call, you guys get to hear “Sukiyanen, Osaka”. Isn’t that better than hearing that boring Singtel greeting all the time? Quality’s crapz though.