think about it

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2-3 days of SIP left. Today will probably be the last day I have to work overtime. I can feel the dull ache and the eye bags already.

*shrugs*

Anyway, Mum got me a temporary job at NParks again. Will be starting there as soon as SIP ends.

Been thinking. I feel I want to say lots of things out…how I feel…how things are. But yet I don’t want to. Coz people might say I’m judging other people and I don’t want to. I feel like being my old self. But yet I don’t want to hurt people. I’ve changed. It sucks being so emotional sometimes.

Recently in the news, some Taiwanese burnt our country’s flag. That was after some Taiwanese minister referred to Singapore as a booger…yea right, talking about the size of Singapore. I’m so glad Singapore isn’t stooping to their level. So those Taiwanese had better reflect on their actions.

Sure…Singapore isn’t as big a country as Taiwan. That we are just a small red dot on the map. But I think we’re surviving better than you guys. Uh uh…before you rebut my statement, think about it. You guys are stuck in a position with China that can blow up any minute. Are we?

mixed up

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Still in the office. Waiting for my colleagues to finish discussing some stuff so they can come check my work.

Strangely, I don’t really feel hungry. Ok…a little…

Feeling quite tired since I slept a little late last night. In the afternoon, started to feel a little cranky. Just going mad with all the work. Quick run to the toilet to sort out my thoughts as well.

I just don’t know…

be a manager

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Thus my weekend is pretty much gone. *sings ala Justin Timberlake style* GONE~~~GONE~~~GONE~~~

I went back to work on Saturday. They had stuff to rush and required my help. I wonder whether it was coz I kept thinking that I have nothing to do in the beginning that they have decided to pile me with work. Or maybe coz I’m leaving soon and they really need my assistance. *shrugs*

Well…it has always been like that. When there’s little/no work, there really is nothing to do and you can be bored to tears. When there’s work to do, it’s really A LOT.

Oh manz…and tell me about it when I say some people can be awfully picky/fickle-minded. It is only a freakin’ demo. I don’t think people will actually scrutinise the size of something. Especially when the pic’s height is short of 7 pixels. C’mon…be realistic manz. You only got so many days to work with. No doubt you must get it up and running by hook or by crook. But I guess you gotta weigh which stuff is more important.

I now understand how someone feels when other people start passing little remarks. The effort that goes behind working on something no matter how small the task is. All the while when I heard those remarks, I was seriously going -_-||| and I could feel a certain person getting a little irritated by the remarks as well.

At that moment, I really felt like telling that person to just shut up manz. You think it’s so damn easy? Why don’t you try doing it as well instead of sitting there and directing people around.

Yea…I do believe in Dogbert and his management tips. Be a manager.

And well…should anybody stumble upon my blog. I shall say what Pwen said before. I’m not pin-pointing anyone in particular. So you can sleep in peace tonight.

testing my patience

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Wah lau eh. God must really be testing my patience this morning.

Stupid taxi driver. Don’t know where’s Ang Mo Kio Street 62, open your mouth and ask lahz. Your mouth is stuffed with gold that you can’t ask? *grrr* Luckily I woke up just in time to see him miss the 2 turns completely, turning to the wrong direction. So he just turned back. Whoa…if I didn’t wake up on time, God knows where he could have taken me to.

*waves fist* And he didn’t even charge me cheaper!!! *grrrr* SMACK YER FACE!!!

And I shall conclude that now I hate 2 types of taxi drivers. Firstly, the kind who like to argue with you even though they are ridiculously and obviously wrong. Secondly, the kind who think they know it all and don’t even open their mouth to double-check.

The former…once, there was this taxi driver who argued with me whether my block was in avenue 5 or street 12. He kept arguing it was street 12 although I tried correcting him. Got so fed up I refused to argue further. What the hell! I live there for 19 years and I don’t even know where my block is situated at? You gotta be kidding…

taking flight

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I’m planning to get my own domain and webspace soon. Used for hosting fanlistings and possibly the JCG photo album. And if I get a little more ambitious, I might try creating the JCG website. Currently one of the members has opened a yahoo photos account to host the photos but the space is running out soon and there’s not even a considerable amount of photos in there.

As to whether I’ll leave trilight, at the moment I’ll say no. Yea…I know I seem to be taking flight real fast. I’ve hardly parked myself here for long and I’m leaving already. That doesn’t feel and sound right.

Oh well…here goes the hunt for cheap and reliable webhosting companies/plans. Recommend please? Anyone?

And…today is lingy-ling’s birthday. Head over here to wish her a happy birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! O tanjoubi omedetou!!!

another day

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Wahahahaha…right now I think I’m addicted to Lene Marlin’s “Another Day” and “Disguise”. Thanks to Nad who lent me her 2 Lene Marlin cds. I listened to the “Another Day” cd like non-stop at work.

I think I might make my next layout one that features Lene Marlin. Maybe…

Love the way the lyrics go for her songs. A little bit on the sad side but not fairytale-like. Very real. Like talking about everyday things that can happen to anybody. Yupz, I love songs with realistic lyrics.

Here’s one with what I call realistic lyrics. I think it’s about someone who committed suicide.

“Story” by Lene Marlin

I heard about your story from a friend
To let go and make an end, that’s what you did
You left some words saying now it would be good
You knew they’d cry, but you hoped they understood
Things you’ve had to face, what you have seen
To make it through each day, you tried,
Without the tears
They tried to help, but they didn’t see you crawl
They knew you fought, but they never
Thought you’d fall
They never thought you’d fall.

Tell them please, how could they know
Hurts inside, no scars to show
You played the lead, and never once you failed
And the place from where you watch us now
Hope you’ve found your peace somehow,
Peace somehow

I heard about your story through the years
Know ’bout all your hurt and fears
I won’t forget
I wrote a song that I wish for you to hear
It’s about yourself and the life you couldn’t bear

Tell them please, how could they know
Hurts inside, no scars to show
You played the lead, and never once you failed
And the place from where you watch us now
Hope you’ve found your peace somehow,
Peace somehow

I wanna remember all there’s about you,
And I know there’s so much
I see all the faces, the tears and embraces
Wish you could be here to see it too

euphoria

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The weekend is always too short!

Thursday…watched “The Terminal” with Jo and Nad at PS after work. The movie was enjoyable. Never expected it to have quite a bit of humour. You guys should go watch it.

After the movie, we had late dinner at Pizza Hut. Yummyyyyyyyyy~~~

Saturday…met up with Ling and Xiu Wei. Just walked around the malls while Ling looked for a nice pair of shoes. We took some neoprints too. Been quite some time since I took neoprints.

Sunday…Ling invited Xiu Wei and I to her house for lunch. Had a filling lunch…steamboat.

Had dinner with family at Mushroom Pot in Orchard Point. Steamboat again…but this place specialises in mushrooms, thus the name of the restaurant. Yes Ling, a good recommendation for you. There’s one at Stadium too. That one’s much bigger.

Before dinner, we went down to Heeren. Sis wanted to redeem tickets for the Tiger Beer Euphoria ’04 concert at the Padang on 9 October. Heh…just coz Shin is performing. Well, but the line up of artistes aren’t that bad. Besides Shin, there’s Lena Park, Shinhwa, Michael Learns To Rock etc… Desmond’s father managed to get this whole bag of Tiger Beer bottlecaps coz he works at Singapore Country Club. We managed to redeem a total of 18 tickets!!! So yea…9×24 bottlecaps…since each set of 24 bottlecaps can redeem 2 tickets. Go do the math.

Oh…and I got a new watch. Been eyeing the Fossil watch for quite some time. The one where the dial changes picture. I do feel a little guilty that Mum paid for it. I think I’ll return her the money instead when I get my next pay.

the best dream yet

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They said dreams are actually a reflection of your subconcious mind?

Then this has gotta be the best dream yet. Although it lasted only for about an hour, I really appreciated it.

Coz in it, you came up to me and said you were sorry. You finally understood how I felt and you didn’t want me to continue feeling rotten about myself and everyone else.

And for once in a long time, I finally felt happy around you guys.

Then, I had to wake up and bounce back into reality. The one where you refused to even actually find out what happened. Now you know why I love sleeping so much. Coz then I can escape reality for awhile.

No, I did not force myself to dream up stuff just coz I like you. Coz it really happened just like that. Perhaps at the far end of my mind, I’m hoping you would talk to me like you did before.

focus

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It’s kinda fast…Thursday already. Officially left with 2 weeks of SIP. Big countdown begins. Haha…

So…Monday, I met up with Nad for dinner. Thought she might need a little company since she wasn’t too happy about certain things. We were back at Coffee Club. Haha…Kid aka the waiter whom we disturbed wasn’t around.

These days, I’m not sure why but maybe I’m tired, I can’t really focus on things. Especially when it’s a few things at the same time. I just kinda space out after a while or my brain just connects too slowly.

With that came the embarassing situation. Coz I reached Coffee Club earlier so Nad said I go get a seat first. Upon getting seated, the waiter/manager asked “Are you joining us for dinner?” I was thinking “WHAT???!!!” I was confused coz if you took that question literally, it would mean that we were going to have dinner with the waiter?! He had to ask that like 5 times before my brain finally connected and I answered “yes”. The question was whether we were having dinner or just having dessert. And the us meant Coffee Club. Hahaha…but maybe he should have rephrased his question so my brain might have connected a little faster.

Tuesday, weather wasn’t good. Rain. Took a cab home. I was tired anyway.

Yesterday, more work coming in. Sometimes I think I work too slowly. Anyway, the problem of focusing came back again. When my colleague came with the work and was explaining to me all the stuff, after the first few screens I kinda spaced out. The whole time I was going “ya…ok”. But in actual fact, my brain wasn’t even thinking and registering at all. Dangerous.

When I was leaving office, my mind was on work and how I might be working too slowly. I was trying to concentrate on watching out for cars and talking to Sis on the phone as well. Just had trouble focussing on everything at the same time. Dangerous again. I could have been hit by a vehicle.

Then at night, I was busy sms-ing Ling and Nad. Sis and Dad were trying to tell me things at the same time. I was also trying to listen to the news on tv. Getting a little pissed off with Sis coz she was just blatantly ignoring my Mum’s yells for her to go bathe. Oh yea…and irritated at the fact that she’s got a sorethroat but instead of resting her throat, she wants to talk so loudly.

Finally I got so fed up, I just switched off the tv. Less noise. Sis and Dad went quiet for a moment at my sudden outburst. And I explained that I had only one brain and 2 ears. So can I just focus on one thing at a time?

I’m so glad Colin and Christie didn’t win The Amazing Race. They are an annoying pair. I think the game is sometimes based on luck and making the right choices at the right time.

sugoi ne

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Updates…

Saturday, met up with Xiu Wei to go shopping. Heeren…Far East…Bugis.

Woohoo! She likes Maroon 5’s “This Love” as well. Yea…and Singapore Idol contestant, Benjamin Eio sang that song. However, I think he was trying too hard to sound like Maroon 5’s lead singer.

Talking about Maroon 5, changed my layout a little. And there’s Maroon 5’s “She Will Be Loved”. Love that song as well.

Yesterday, went to Waseda High school for their annual fun fair. It was a JCG activity but Sis and I went by ourselves. Per and Desmond came along too. Something like TP’s CCN day except it’s more fun since there are more games. Caught 2 yo-yos…that was the maximum number you could catch.

Sidetrack a little…actually I kinda thought our class could do the yo-yo game for CCN day in year 2 coz the game’s really fun. The yo-yos I’m talking about are actually small balloons filled with a little water. Attached to it is this long rubber band. So you fill this pool of water and put all those balloons in. The game goes like this…you get a hook. Attached to it is tissue paper. You hold the tissue paper and try to get the hook to hook a yo-yo. There’s technique to it coz the minute the tissue paper gets wet, it can’t hold the weight of the yo-yo. So the tissue breaks from the hook and…no yo-yo for you. Anyway, everyone was really busy in year 2…and…oh well…

Then, there was this Where’s Wally game. You get this game sheet. You are given a clue. Using the clue, you gotta find the correct place where Wally’s waiting. He will in turn tell you another clue and you gotta find the next place. There were 5 places to find in 15 minutes. Haha…Per and I were like running here and there.

Lots more other fun games. Food and performances.