reason

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I know what you want to say next. It’s all too familiar. Too many times have I been warned, sometimes bordering on being threatened that you have an uncontrollable rage and I should just shut up. But what I want to know then is whether deficiency overrules reason? Frankly speaking, sometimes I wonder whether you are just using it as an excuse to shut me up.

It hurts that I can’t argue my point. And leads me to wonder whether we live to please others only or also ourselves? That we have to give the politically correct answers and not what we actually feel. I remember myself typing these exact same words for a friend.

When I do things by myself so as to prevent myself from getting into situations where we end up quarrelling, I get scolded as being selfish. When I let you do things first so that I wouldn’t be scolded as being selfish, I point it out to you, instead of seeing a little smile as a thank you, “I never asked you to do this for me” gets shoved back in my face. When you point out other’s mistakes, they are expected to listen and reflect. When we point out your mistakes, we are expected to shut up. Where then does reason come in?

Before I’m being accused something I’m not (something which I hate most), you think I do not realise but sometimes I do. I know there are times when I’m being わがまま. Then the times when I don’t realise, you point it out with reason and I agree and reflect.

I’m not expecting you to say you’re sorry coz given your strong nature, even if you felt a little sorry you would choose to remain silent or worse, still try to argue the parts where you’re right. Just as you know me in some ways, I know you in some ways too.

so you want to be a star?

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Dreaming of being a star? Better think again. It ain’t that glamourous afterall. It’s a cruel world out there. It’s not enough even if you have good vocals. You need to be able to dance, act, host etc… 3-4 days, that’s all the time you’re given to learn a new dance. Slow learners, you can forget about eating or sleeping until you nail it.

Was watching this clip on Berryz工房’s journey from the day the unit was formed. Mind you, these girls started out when they were only 9-11 years old.

I really wonder how they juggled school and work. Work seems to be neverending. Recording. Learn the dance. Activities to promote the single/album. Back to the studio to record new song. A neverending cycle.

First incident. Dance lesson for first single, “あなたなしでは生きてゆけない”. The girls are formed into 2 groups to practise some dance steps. Momoko, Miyabi, Maiha and Chinami in one group. Saki, Yurina and Risako in another. Maasa wasn’t present for this lesson. After the first group danced, Maiha got reprimanded by the dance teacher that she needed to practise more. While the next group danced for the teacher, the first group should be practising at the back of the room. But somehow, Maiha was sitting alone in a corner…

Then comes the insecurity. The feeling that you’re so far behind the rest…the fear that you can’t make it.

So what if you’re in pain, life still has to go on. You can’t just give up as you like.

So you think you can handle it? This post is a reminder for all those who dream of becoming a star. It isn’t just what you see on tv. All the glitz and glamour. Instructors don’t care whether you can or cannot coz even if you cannot, you better make that cannot into a can.

Sometimes I wonder whether Maiha left the group coz she found it hard to juggle both work and studies. Especially since it seems that she is the slow learner for dance in the group. The company just released the statement that she graduated from the group to focus on her studies. I’m just speculating. What I’m thinking may not be true.

one word: fugly

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Take a look at Samsung’s new phone. P300.

No, your eyes are not playing tricks on you. It does look a lot like a calculator. *sarcastic* Might as well just pick up my calculator and pretend it’s a phone. And I thought PDAs which double up as phones were bad enough.

What a fugly phone.

last of news

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Relax…only for the rest of this year. But that was bad enough for me to go on a mini spree, since I heard that from May (their hiatus) onwards, everything of theirs will be taken down in the Johnny’s shop. Which means that when I go to Japan this year, I won’t be able to buy anything of theirs. 😥

Massu uchiwa, Massu file and tour pamphlet. Ahahahahaha…pink spots! :rofl: Still love the uchiwa from Summary concert coz that’s the only one so far with his name in kanji. His hair is somewhat a little messier for this uchiwa. :love: The contents (photos) for this tour pamphlet is better than the previous one.

Group poster. I had doubts about getting this poster. There wasn’t a photo to show how the poster looked like when I ordered it. I was prepared to sell it if it didn’t look good. After browsing the Japan auctions, I saw the photo for it and well, it didn’t look good. But when I collected and saw it, I think it looks fine. 🙂 So, I’m going to keep it afterall.

I saved the best for last. The Massu poster!!! *fangirl scream* :heart: :heart: :heart: It’s like whoa! Huge! His face is even bigger than mine! The second photo is to show you how big the poster is with relation to the bed. Now I understand why Mini (Cynthia) freaked out when her mirror reflected Yoko’s eye. Sorry, photos had to be taken at a slant since the light’s reflection can be seen when I take it upright.

With that, I’m now seriously broke. 🙁

completing the sentence

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Taken from Ling’s blog.

1. My ex is: Ex? What ex? Don’t even have one to speak (ill) of. HAHAHA…

2. Maybe I should: get a job.

3. I love: Massu. :love:

4. I don’t understand: why money doesn’t fall from the sky.

5. I lose: at all arcade games. Lousy player nyahaha… :rofl:

6. People say I’m: Come on, say it. Say it in MY FACE.

7. Love is: magic. That MAX song…

8. Somewhere, someone is: cursing me? :rofl:

9. I will always: eat, sleep, use the computer.

10. Forever is: bullshit in some cases.

11. I never want to: *searches for an answer* drink milk???

12. I think the current US President: Whatever lahz.

13. When I wake up in the morning: I sleep in the morning. How’s that?

14. My past was: How far back do you wanna go? But I guess I’m pretty much the same back then and now.

15. I get annoyed when: people interrupt me while I’m doing something on the computer.

16. Parties are for: you to enjoy. Oh really? *raises eyebrow*

17. My dog is: make-believe. Woof.

18. My cat is: make-believe. Meow.

19. Kisses are the best when: it’s chocolate. (Hershey’s)

20. Tomorrow: I’ll be eating, sleeping and using the computer…I bet.

21. I really want: to watch a NewS concert. No money…damnit.

22. I have low tolerance for people who: ask me questions without trying first, especially on IT stuff. Who do you think I am? Some computer guru? I’m just as clueless as you are.

nijuuichi

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Supposed to have a birthday post but was too tired after all the celebrating and all. Anyway, happy belated birthday 剛くんとMandy Mooreと私. I share the same birthday with a few stars. Hahaha…

Dinner with 7ners at Ramen Ten in Far East Plaza. Luckily no showers of blessing again.

People expect 21st birthdays to be celebrated in style. Throw a huge party, invite almost every friend you know, have a blast. But I chose to have a quiet one. Same like the past 2 years? I don’t want to invite people and then they turn up just coz but after that, they probably don’t even remember when’s my birthday anymore. It’ll be even better if someone just surprises me by remembering my birthday and call me up to say “hey, let’s have lunch or dinner together to celebrate.” But I think what makes this year’s birthday all the more memorable would have to be the cake.

Per baked it. :heart: :heart: :heart: So sweet! Both the thought and literally. Hahaha… Sof told me, but she didn’t need to tell me coz I could guess from the Japanese words on the cake. It was pretty sweet so some of us had a hard time finishing their slice. I personally thought it was a little sweet but fine if I had some water to down after eating it so I won’t get a sore throat. Anyway, I told Sis that even if it tasted way horrible I would still eat it. Coz it’s the thought and effort that went into baking it. :love:

Me doing the famous “手越です!” handsign with my present from the 7ners. It’s a Fossil watch. Photos of the watch further down. The box was specially chosen by Per. :heart: She was asking me to guess why she chose that box. I stared at the picture on the box for awhile…rollerskates… Then I figured out why. Confirmed it by asking her whether it had something to do with Massu. Yes. Massu is like a famous rollerskates/rollerblades boy in JE. Thanks Per for putting in so much thought even for the box. *big hugz* Oh…the little tiara is supposed to be passed down to each 7ner for their 21st birthday. Jo having received it first.

My presents for this year’s birthday. It began with the 2 pendants from my grandma. I’ve been wearing one ever since it was bought, weeks before my birthday. It’s a heart-shaped case with a movable diamond inside. The other is 2 dragonflies. Red packets from my aunt and Mum. Mum also topped up my bank account so it would not hit danger zone. Hehe…


Pooh bear! Another tami from Xianglin! She couldn’t get the one from Tomy coz it was sold out. This one’s from Sega but it’s just as cute. Sorry, my fascination for tamis will never die. Thanks best friend!!! *big hugz*


Closer look at the Fossil watch from 7ners. Gotta go remove some links though. My wrist is small. :rofl:


A pretty handphone strap from Joyce. It can be removed and used as a pendant as well. I was thinking what to remove on my overcrowded handphone but I guess I could also remove each heart and use it as charms for my charm bracelet? Thanks Joyce for the lovely present. *big hugz*

Thanks to Pwen, Cas and Cheng Huat for birthday wishes via sms. Pwen being the first one and all the way from Australia. I :heart: you!!! Thanks to Melanie for her birthday wish via friendster. Thanks to Ling for her birthday wish via her blog. Thanks to my family for making sure I had my blackforest cake. HAH! Sis and I won the battle of whether the fruits in the blackforest cake are blueberries or cherries. Check here if you don’t believe it.

the best one yet

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I’ve seen chatlines use MM girls, Ai Otsuka, Kyoko Fukada, Misaki Ito, Ueto Aya in their pathetic advertisements in the newspapers or magazines. I’ve seen one use a JE boy…Jin. But this has got to be the best one yet. In today’s Newpaper. I didn’t even notice it at first coz I was reading the article above. Caught sight of it just as I was going to turn the page. Picture’s too big…click to see it.

OMG. They used Ryo. If JE knew about this, JE would have sued their asses off. Even official drama sites aren’t allowed to have pictures of the JE boys. Next who would I see? Massu? :rofl:

Dinner was at Curry Favor. I think this celebration is going to be an unforgettable one. Haha…showers of blessing. The waitress spilled a whole glass of water on me. Which soaked the right side of my top, the back of my skirt and…ermz…my un…ok never mind. Luckily my bag was just behind me so I didn’t sit right into the seat or else…my whole back might have gotten wet.

I think after working in the service line, I’ve changed a lot on how I tolerate such things. I wasn’t angry or anything. That’s precisely why I don’t really want to work at a restaurant. Accidents like that can happen and when it does happen, not everybody is that forgiving. Working in the service line makes you see things from the server’s point of view. I bet she would have wanted to dig a hole right there and then to bury herself. And having served all kinds of customers, I tell myself not to be one of those irritating/inconsiderate/rude customers.

Anyway…I got my blackforest cake. Haha…

miyabi

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I know this is quite boliao to talk about especially when it’s 4+am in the morning. I changed my wallpaper. It’s similar to the previous one. I guess coz 10 April is coming and I wanted to do something for myself. So yay. :heart: Per and I were talking about Miyabi just now so I thought why not. She has some pretty photos but I gotta say that Risako’s one looks better this time. In case anyone can’t figure what the hell I’m rambling about…

And I finally got the PV for Berryz工房’s “ジリリ キテル”. They are growing up and Tsunku’s definitely marketing them as young ladies and not kids unlike what he did to Kago and Tsuji for at least 5 years. :whistle: I think Yurina’s having a growth spurt coz I don’t remember her being that tall. She’s 13 afterall…puberty. She is tall but didn’t think she was THAT tall. She’s really towering over everyone. 友理奈，你到底吃什么长大的? Poor Saki. Captain of Berryz工房, oldest but smallest in size.

Before I forget. It’s P’s birthday!!! And they are in Hokkaido. Still in the midst of the concert tour. お誕生日おめでとう!!!

Omg…it’s raining AGAIN. Yes, complete with thunder and a little lightning. And I should be sleeping. Alrighty, off to bed.